Never Had a Dream Come True
by Sanada Usako
Summary: A Songfic based off of the 'Ronin Warriors Neo' universe. It takes a look into the backstory of that story line. Specifically into Meia's feeling right after she left Toyama to find her destiny and left Ryo for good. Please R&R I'm really proud of this pe


**_Never Had a Dream Come True  
_**A Songfic based off of 'Ronin Warriors Neo:The Faith Saga'  


  
  
  
  
_Everybody's got something   
that they had to leave behind  
One regret from yesterday  
That just seems to grow with time  
_ I walked through the streets of Kyoto, it was past midnight and only the street lamps lite the road. I sighed and tough of him. Where was he now? I hoped with all my heart he was happy. I coulld never be happy without him, that was for sure. My heart forever belonged with him, to be near him. To feel his warmth agaisn't her, to breath in his scent. But that was all gone now. I had to go away, it was my destiny. But why did it hurt so?  
_Theres no use looking back or wondering  
how things could be now or might have been  
All this I know but still I can't find ways to let you go  
_ I pictured myself with him for a moment but quickly shook my head. No. I could nevr be with him. If I was the mortal world would be placed in extreme peril! The Wildfire armor must have the Starfire and the Starfire could not exsist without the Wildfire. Then a image came to mind unbidden. Ryo with another woman, and a family. And myself still alone and scared without him.   
_I never had a dream come true  
till the day that I found you  
Even though I pretend that I've moved on  
You'll always be my baby  
_ Tears formed in my eyes as I thought of the day I had left Shinjuku. Saying goodbye to all the boys had been hard, we'd all grown so close during our battles with Talpa. And Natsui had done sooo much for us. But Ryo was the hardest. I could barely hold back my tears as I bid him goodbye. But at the last moment before I hopped in my car I remembered, the ring. And so I had turned around back to him and stopped in front of him. My trembling fingers had dug into my pocket and pulled out the ring he'd given me a week before. He tried to give it back but I wouldn't hear of it.  
"It's your Ryo. I can't take."  
"But I gave it to you?" His voice was nearly pleading.  
"And you asked me to promise something. A promise I can't keep. So its yours now. I wont be needing it."   
"...."  
"Please, I can't bear to take it."_  
Never found the words to say  
You're the one I think about each day  
And I know no matter where life takes me to  
A part of me will always be with you  
_ All my life I had been so alone, until I ha found him. He was my sunlight each morning and my moonlight each night. And the fates had cruly played games with us, letting us fall in love. Never a word that we could never be toghter. It would have been kinder to tell us. But it dawned upon me, that my armor operated off my love for him, that in telling us earlier that would have taken all its power away. The Starfire would be useless without its bearers love for the beaer of Wildfire. But it was cruel to those who bore the armors, to make them give up that all consuming love in their hearts and find someone else when there could be no one else for them. Ryo had forever claimed my heart and I could not give it to another, it was no longer mine to give. _  
Somewhere in my memory  
I've lost all sense of time  
And Tommarow can never be  
Cause today is all that fills my mind  
_ I could remeber all our battles toghter, those precious times when I could protect him from whatever threatened. And all the times he tried to protect her not even aware of the irony of the situation. The day they had met....  
I had been late for school again that morning and my first period teacher had been really pissed of at me this time. He had given me loads of extra homework. I sighed and sat down on one of the benchs alone to start it.  
"Hey shrimp! What do you think your doing!"  
I looked up at the voice and saw my ex, Joshua, threatening another boy. I was about to go back to my homework when the new boy spoke up.  
"I'm sorry wasn't watching where I was going..." His voice was soft and gentle.  
"Like hell you weren't! What do you think your doing anyway!"  
"Hey Josh, I think we should make him pay." One of Joshua's cronies snickered gleefully.  
"Yeah I think your right." Josh laughed and brought his hand up to punch the boy in the stomuch.   
Before I knew what I was doing I had lept up and gotten to the spot. I knocked away Josh's fist with my left hand a threw a forefist punch straight into his face.  
"You Bitch what did you do that for?!" Josh yelled, the blood spilling out of his nose.  
"Because I'm sick of seeing you treat people like dirt!"_  
Theres no use looking back or wondering  
How it should be now or might have been  
All this I know but I still can't find ways to let you go  
_ Even when I had been possessed he tried to protect me. And I could never bring myself to touch him, no matter what the spirit in my head said. Nothing could force me to lay a hand on him. And afterwards when I had realized what I'd done. Nothing could make me forgive myself, even now I know that it was my fault, my inability to fight the deamon inside me.   
Tears streaked down my face as I thought of how happy I could be with him. Thoughts of what could have been filled my head. A family with him, our family. It's what I wanted even now that I knew the price of that. I was being selfish of course, I had to think of the fate of Earth before I thought of myself. As the Guaridan Starfire I was bound to protect Earth and sacrifice my happiness for the sake of the planet.   
I had often wondered that if the Ronin Warriors protected Earth and the Guardian Starfire protected the Ronin(specifically Wildfire) then who protected their happiness. Who protected the happiness of those six warriors forever bound to defend the planet from Talpa. Now I knew, no one did. We were forever fated to sacrifice our happiness for the sake of the little blue planet we lived on. Never to be relieved of our duty till we died our a new bearer appeared, and even then the pain wasn't over. If a new bearer appeared it would have to be our own fleash and blood, we would have to see them go through what we did. But none of the other warriors knew my pain, only Ryo. Fate was the cruelest to the Guardian Starfire and Wildfire, to make them fall in love and then split them apart.   
_I never had a dream come true  
till the day that I found you  
Even though that I pretend that I've moved on  
You'll always be my baby  
_ But I have to hold my head high despite what cruel games fate has played with my heart. If I was to obey my destiny, the destiny that had drove me away from my love, then I must find another. Someone who could make me happy, someone I could live with for the remainder of my life, and I must have children. Though I no longer have my heart to give to the one I marry I must find someone who can live without my heart, they must make due with what is left. Once my children are born my duty is just about over. The armor will be passed on to one of those and my only remaining duty was to hand over to armor if I still lived when the time came. But I would be forever robbed of my love, never would I know what it is like to marry the one I love and have children with him, to live happily ever after.   
Anubis had said once that he wished that they story of the Ronin Warriorshad a happy ending, but alas it did not. Then I had thought he ment we would losen to Talpa. But now I know, I know he ment that the story of Starfire and Wildfire did not have a happy ending. That we had to sacrifice our hearts to ensure the peace of Earth throughout eternity._  
Never found the words to say  
You're the one I think about each day  
And I know no matter where life takes me to  
A part of me will always be  
_ I cannot say I have no regrets about all this. I wish Anubis hadn't had to die, I wish that none of it had never happened for a matter a fact. But if it hadn't I know that I would never have found this wonderful feeling, that my fate had lead me to intervine that day when Josh attacked Ryo, that already the protective instincts of the Starfire were inside me. The armor had made me want to protect him, not my heart. Eventually it had been my heart, but at that time I hadn't known him, nothing pulled at me besides my destiny as the Guardian Starfire.   
I wish that I had never allowed myself to be captured by the Deamon King and been used as a prison to that princess. Funny, you would think that with her trapped in my head all that time I would know pleanty about her, but I don't. I only know that her name was Meyana and she was a princess, the princess of the universe. And that she was running from something, a dark shadow loomed over her. That she felt the same boundless love that I felt. But still, I think Ryo and the others know more about her than I do. I barely even remember the final battle, everything revealied there.   
My biggest regret is that I never told Ryo exactly how much he ment to me. The words 'I love You' simply weren't enough, but I could never find another way of saying it._  
You'll always be the dream that fills my head  
yes you will say you will you know you will oh baby  
You'll always be the one I know I'll never forget  
_ My heart aches at what I did to him the day I left. I had make him take the ring back, I had begged him. Told him I couldn't lived with it. And I could see in his eyes that he thought I ment I wanted to forget. About him and the others, about everything that happened and everything we shared. But I couldn't get it out without bursting into tears, and then I would never be able to leave. He would have held me and if he did I wouldn't have been able to leave him. I couldn't tell him that I couldn't take it because if I did I wouldn't be able to do what I was leaving to do, I wouldn't be able to ever settle down with it there reminding me. That I loved him and always would no matter what happened. Just another mark on the long list of my sins agaisnt him. _  
Theres no use looking back or wondering  
because love is a strange and funny thing  
No matter how I try and try I just can't say goodbye  
No no no no  
_ Love is strange indeed. It makes you feel like you could fly sometimes and others it hurts until you can't stand it. It hurts now, the pain is unbearable bu I must bear it. I couldn't end anything yet, not yet. That would betray him and everything our love had stood for. Everything he promised me with our last kiss. But I could never live up to him. He was perfect and his love was perfect. He has never done any wrong unto me. But I have done countless wrongs to him. Too long was the list and I could nevr make it up to him. But I must try and I will try._  
I never had a dream come true  
till the day that I found you  
Even though that I pretend that I've moved on  
You'll always be my baby  
_ Maybe I never told him what my world had been like till the day I met him. Just how important him being in my life was. Until then I had been awfully screwed up. Not to mention that because of my lack of family life I went out with just about any hot guy who'd ask. And I'd lost my virginty at 14 and a half. His name was Frank and I'll never forget, espcially after I'd met Ryo. Another sin against him, I didn't have anything to give him that sense. And after I'd lost it I went around screwing every boyfriend I had. And I guess I thought I was happy. But eventually my reputation for being 'easy' got the best of me. More and more violent guys took me out and I'd let them. And I just put those pain when they hit into the back of my head. But Joseph had been the last straw, he beat me brutally and I'll always bear the three scars across my stomach from his beatings. I came to my senses at that time and dumped him like a sack of potatos. And not long after that Ryo came into my life. And I was never quite that same._  
Never found the words to say  
You're the one I think about each day  
And I know no matter where life takes me to  
A part of me will always be  
a part of me will always be  
with you  
_ I stared up at the bleak sky with a sigh. But all those perfect moments between us were gone now. As destiny wound its road through eternity and sperated us. What cruel games fate plays with our hearts. But I couldn't dewl in this forever as I wanted to. I had to move on. Forever. What a nice thought. I had wanted him to hold me forever that night when Anubis had come to us. For him to hold me forever and make it not be true. Let us stay like that until the universe came crashing down around us. I just know that we were made for each other. I just know it, he completed me in every way. So why? If we were so perfect for each other, why did we have to stay apart. What ever cruel god made these rules up, I know is out there somewhere laughing at me. At my sorrow. But still, my mind drifted as I sat on the sidewalk, still I would never forget him and his warm touch. The heat he possessed unknowingly.   
I jumped at a tap at my shoulder and looked up to see a young man with redish brown hair falling in his face. I reconized him as Chris, a guy from work. "Miss are you alright?"  
I shook my hair out of my face and smiled at him. "Yes I'm fine."  
"Maybe I should walk you home, it's dangerous to be out here at this time of night."  
I nodded to himand stood up. Ryo was my past, a past I would never forget, but still my past. If I was to complee this wrecthed destiny I needed to look to the future. Best to start here and now with this Chris. As he and I moved through the streets my last thought before we arrived at my apartment was of Ryo's smile. That wonderful smile of his that lite up his eyes, those beautiful blue eyes.   
  
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The song 'Never Had a Dream Come True' i the property of S Culb 7, I just borrowed it to portray Meia Star's feelings after she left Toyama to find her destiny. This songfic provides a view into the backstory of my 'Neo-Ronins Trilogy'   
The characters Ryo, Rowen, Sage, Sai, Kento, Natsui, White Blaze, and Yuli belong to their creators and Graz Entertainment. I'm just borrowing them for a while.


End file.
